Nathalie's Notes

Off the cuff psych profiles

Matt doesn't read my blog but I told him I was hoping for comments on this and he says: Oh, I don't have to read your blog to have comments. What's the question and I'll give you comments. He surprised me with the following super-detailed pseudo psychological profiles on my characters.

• Nicholas: He goes by Nicholas instead of Nick? Hmm. Kinda uptight, tall, thin, maybe balding a little bit, wire rimmed glasses, decent looking guy – kinda prissy, comes off a a little prissy but actually pretty down to earth. Sober, likes to laugh but doesn’t do it just at the drop of a hat. Professional but kind of hippy dippy, kinda granola. Matt has started saying "hippy dippy" more since he read my first couple drafts. It is funny to me to hear him unintentionally quoting one of my characters.

• Vanessa – urban, very curly hair, pretty but maybe a little bit on the trashy side – like she wears a leather skirt when it’s maybe not appropriate. Probably pretty volatile. Acts sweet but she can turn on you. Probably not a professional, checkered past. Vanessa’s the girl who offends your mom when they first meet and you marry her anyway. And then you pay for it.  
• Virginia – how old? 40s? Okay: A professional, probably has a couple kids either teenagers or out of the house, successful career she went back to – dresses professionally maybe more formally then the environment requires but not over the top. The least casual in the office probably. Doesn’t wear much makeup, not because she’s granola but because it’s not something she values. When she thinks of herself she doesn’t see her own face. Very friendly, almost flamboyant when she’s in a good mood but her relationships are either professional or casual and always fairly superficial.
• Emma:16, blond, kind of an airhead, so light a blond that you almost question if it’s a platinum bleach, very happy and positive to the point where some people take it as unprofessional or too familiar maybe. She deals with nervousness or fear through laughing even at inappropriate moments, like her grandma’s funeral when she was six. And not just laughing but laughing uncontrollably at some random stimulus that strikes her funny.
• Ginny -  Jenny, like a female donkey? Oh my gosh, honey. Well, Ginny is … wow what is Ginny? Ginny is an over achiever, would be called a workaholic except that a great deal of her overachieving is spent in her own garden or something … she’s most comfortable in denim button up shirts and overalls or pinstriped button up shirt … what she feels most herself in. Really energetic. One of those people who seems to have a ton of momentum already going when other people are just showing up for work, she happily stays until other people leave without ever drawing attention the fact that she’s staying and then goes home and does her thing with her goats and her garden.
• Isabella – (Vanessa's daughter, right?) looks up to Vanessa and attempts to model herself after her but recognizes qualities she doesn’t like and doesn’t want to embrace. She’s really pretty but doesn’t think she’s as pretty as her mom because she doesn’t dress like her mom but she doesn’t like how it feels to dress like her mom so she always feels like she’s the ugly duckling or something. And because of that she works really hard to win approval from her mom.  Pretty smart and talented, she musical, and maybe even a really pretty voice. She’s kind of shy doesn’t make friends really easily maybe has some other family members that she’s really close to, she gives the impression of feeling out of place wherever she is, even by herself.

 

What's in a name?

One of my favorite posts asked you guys for your first impressions based on a character's name. It was fun to read how similar (and how different) some of the impressions were to the characters. Here are a few more from Pants on Fire. If you want to play, same deal:

For each name, tell me what kind of a person you picture in terms of appearance, personality, quirks and habits. And, of course, there are no wrong answers. If you're not into posting online, email me your impressions.

• Nicholas
• Vanessa
• Virginia
• Emma
• Ginny
• Isabella

Got Skype?

July's Baby on Board column ran today. I was nervous about it because when I submitted it I felt like it wasn't everything I wanted it to be. By the time I submit an assignment I am usually pretty satisfied with the end result. Sometimes I'm even sick of it from correcting and tweaking it so much.

"Sometimes things look better in column inches than Word," Matt assured me. I was holding my breath when I opened the paper and happily exhaled as I realized it read just fine. Matt was right, all the worry was for nothing.

This picture is of my parents and Sam enjoying a cross-continental breakfast/highball.

Mock me if you must

Did I mention I made a flyer to post around town in search of Giraffe? Matt sent a copy of it

Download giraffe_flyer.doc

around at work with this note: my son lost his giraffe and my wife lost her mind.

I say mock me if you must, but I'm proud to be that kind of mom. Plus, it worked. Yeah, that's right. Sam was reunited with Giraffe this afternoon after I got this call:

Hi, are you the one with the ad for the giraffe?

Yeah! Did you find it?

No but I got your number from the flyer because I saw it on my friend's porch the other day and recognized it. She picked it up on a walk and wasn't sure what to do about it. You know, I don't normally read flyers but I couldn't help look closer at this one. I thought, 'a baby is missing?'"

Okay. The flyer might've been a little dramatic. Maybe even slightly misleading but come on, people! If my kid was missing I wouldn't be putting up cute little flyers next to the garage sale ads.

Some people (you know who you are) thought maybe the giraffe was missed more by me than Sam. And that might be a little bit true. At least he got over it a lot quicker than I did. But I have to tell you, when he saw Giraffe again his little face lit up in recognition and he reached out for it like he doesn't do with anything else. He wanted to play with it on the way home but I had to wash it first so I compromised and hung it from the top of his stroller. He stroked Giraffe's ear all the way home as he gazed at it adoringly.

Thank you to everyone who looked for Giraffe – from the kids at the skate park to the post office ladies to Amy who noticed I'd put the wrong phone number on the flyer (I was distraught) and especially to Jo who drove all around Portland in search of a replacement.

joy remembered

It occurred to me yesterday that life doesn't have to be hard. There are things that suck and funks to go through but that's okay. I mean, you don't have to try to change that fact about life. And somehow knowing that, remembering it, leaves you open to more joy.

I'm not sure if I was in some kind of delayed post-partum deal or what but I'm feeling more balanced and more like me. It helps that I'm sleeping more- thank you God, Sam and Dr.K - and also that I'm back to working on my book again. I need to figure out how to keep working on it while on deadline for other projects.

Last week when Sam's sleep shenanigans came to head I was totally out of my mind. Matt asked me when I last worked on my book. While his timing is suspect, he nailed it. Creative writing is more than a hobby for me. It's like right up there with sleep and oxygen

In search of Giraffe

I know I've been a parent for 8 1/2 months now but every now and then this wave of awe and joy washes over me: wow. I'm a mom! And they don't always come at glamorous moments. Sometimes it's simple, ordinary things that make feel like a total rock star. Or completely crazy.

• The first time I carried Sam slung over my shoulder up the stairs and caught our shadow.
• The first time (and subsequent times) I licked my finger and wiped something off his face.
• When I stand covered in puke without making a sound so he goes back to sleep.
• Tonight when I embarrassed myself on Main Street - again!

About tonight. Sam has this stuffed giraffe he loves. It's The One and he picked it - plucked it right out of his crib one day. Since then Giraffe has been faithfully by his side. Until tonight when it mysteriously disappeared. I have looked everywhere I can think of and no dice. I finally took a drive retracing our afternoon walk searching for Giraffe. I even got out and searched around the park.

"Hi, Mrs. Hardy!" A chorus called from the pool. For the first time it occurred to me that it wasn't bedtime for anyone else and I was out in public in my pajama bottoms and nursing tank top.

"Uhhhm. Hi. Hey, have you seen a stuffed Giraffe around here? About this big?" I asked, crossing my arms in front of me as I back away. 

Sam managed to fall asleep without him but I'm not sure I will until I figure out what happened to it. Lucy, I have to tell you, is looking pretty smug tonight.

So long as I don't embarrass myself

Whenever I'm ignoring being on the verge of falling on my metaphysical ass, I manage to make a big spectacle out of doing it in public. This scene is typically followed by a sprained ankle which forces me to re-evaluate my priorities and methods for honoring them.

Last week, a day after launching Operation Sleeping Sam, I decided to take Sam for a little walk before his bath. It was a short window of time, just enough to go to the post office and back. As I'm pushing the stroller out the door Lucy cocked her head and gave me the look saying: "remember when it was me you used to walk?" Fine. Couldn't find her magic no-pulling leash. Figured she's been improving as we've worked with her more and more. Plus it's a short walk and time is ticking. So out the door we go with a plain old leash.

We have an uneventful trip to the post office where Lucy passes several dogs off leash and ignores them completely. I praise her profusely. As we're walking down Main Street I notice a group of teenagers hanging out near where we usually cross. As a puppy we taught Lucy to run across intersections. Seemed like a good idea at the time. Not so much with the stroller addition. Hmm. I picture myself running across the street with stroller and dog and flash back to junior high. I don't want to embarrass myself. So we walk a little farther. I saw the black lab, tied up, ahead of us. I had a feeling in my stomach. We should go back. But, you know, I didn't want to embarrass myself. We walk toward the next crosswalk.

This part is hard to explain because it happened so fast and I still can't tell you how it all went down. Suddenly the black lab was loose and coming toward Lucy. Lucy jerked herself toward the dog, hackles up. There's a sharp pain in my wrist as she lunges and the dogs tangle under me, the stroller heads into the highway with Sam in it and I'm on my ass in the middle of Main Street with a rolled ankle and desperate grip on the wheels of the stroller until a Nice Stranger rushes over and gets Sam back to safety. Sam, by the way, totally unperturbed by the whole scene. Me? Well, I was a little bit mortified.

Punky on my back

Sam's new "container." For some reason, he loves hanging out in this backpack. We've even eaten a couple meals with him propped up in it beside the table. This backpack is a key part of our new sleep system since he naps in it. What a funny little dude!

Time for a change

I'm thinking it's time to change some of my writing habits. I used to work really well on "deadline mode." In fact, the pressure of a deadline used to be more motivating than stressful.

But that was back when I could literally check out and ignore everything and everyone until I was officially done. Now that there's this unpredictable little human being counting on me to keep him alive. While Matt is fully capable of fending for himself, Sam? Not so much. I was so cranky trying to meet my column deadline I could hardly stand myself. I'm surprised Sam didn't sleep more just to avoid listening to me read him another draft in a sing-song voice.

In order to not have Sam equate working mommy with mean mommy, I'm going to tweak this waiting till the last minute habit so I'm not frantic when things go sideways.

I have a little down time before gearing up for the next project to catch up on chores, sleep and blogging. Do you guys have a zillion half-written posts in your drafts box, too?

On deadline and delirious

On deadline and delirious but wanted to post quickly that I didn't dive into a hole or anything. Things are, in fact, getting much better at the Hardy home. Let's see-why could that be? Oh! Because we are sleeping better. Much, much better. But every spare ounce of energy is going into concentrating on developing a healthy routine for Sam's sleeping since he was officially diagnosed as chronically sleep deprived. He logged a record 11 hours in his crib a couple nights in a row. Not that he slept that whole time, but he's doing better. We all are.